


Hope in the Darkness

by GneissCastiel



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Being an angel condom, Gen, Possession
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-05
Updated: 2018-08-05
Packaged: 2019-06-22 06:38:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 859
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15575952
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GneissCastiel/pseuds/GneissCastiel
Summary: Dean always talks about how he can’t see the light at the end of the tunnel.





	Hope in the Darkness

Being possessed by an angel is complete darkness. Dean thought that he knew darkness from climbing out of his grave after hell. but this? This is worse. There is no sound or feeling of any kind just complete silent darkness. 

Time must be passing but there is no way to tell. You can only hum Metalica so many times in your head.

Just as Dean is starting to understand how this bottomless darkness drives most vessel’s mad, he sees it. 

The Light. It’s bright. So bright. He thinks even if his eyes were well adjusted he still would not be able to look at it straight on. 

Then just like that, it’s gone again. 

Dean wonders why after being so compressed by Michael for so long why did he let that Light through? Why let Dean see nothing for so long and then that? Dean wonders for a while if it was Michael himself. Angels are supposed to be made of light right? Dean quickly discards this theory because if it was Michael then why doesn’t he see it all the time? It has to be something else then. 

Then Dean comes to a realization the Light has saved him. It gives him something to think about. To do. Instead of slowly losing his mind to the suppressive darkness he now has something to hold on to. 

Then all of a sudden it’s back.

No matter how much it hurts Dean looks at it straight on this time. 

But does it hurt? Dean’s not even sure that is the right word after feeling nothing for so long. 

The longer Dean looks the more he starts to notice things. The Light isn’t steady. It pulses and changes in a way that’s almost musical. It’s also not pure white more of a blue. Dean remembers people with near-death-experiences always talking about a bright white light. Either they didn’t get a good enough look or this is a different light. Because, Yes, this Light is blue. A bright blue that reminds Dean of neon signs. Except it dances and changes with rhythm and patterns.

It’s beautiful, Dean thinks and not just because all he has to compare it to is darkness. No, there is something inherently beautiful about the Light, that Dean thinks would be beautiful anywhere. 

Then just like that, the light is gone again.

All Dean thinks about is the light. Next time, Dean thinks, he is going to move towards it. Isn’t that what you are supposed to do? In all those movies and stories they talk about moving toward the light to move on. Now Dean knows he isn’t dead. He knows exactly where he is. Crushed under Michael’s ass somewhere, trapped in his own body. But there is just something about the Light and its pulsing dances that calls to Dean. Dean is not even sure he can move. But he has to try it’s the only plan he can think of: To move toward the light.

Dean thinks it takes longer this time to show up but its hard to be sure. When the Light finally does show up. Dean swears it looks weaker. or maybe farther away? After looking at it for a while Dean remembers his plan and tries to move. It takes everything that Dean is but he swears he can see the Light grow brighter, closer.  
It’s slow going and Dean prays all the way that the light doesn’t disappear this time. 

As he moves he notices new things about the Light. It’s not just one light but thousands maybe millions of smaller Lights. That’s where the pulses come from. These smaller lights are constantly turning off and on but there are so many that the overall brightness of the light never wavers. 

These lights remind him of something but he can’t quite put his finger on it. Like something from a dream maybe or a faded memory. 

He is so close now he can no longer make out the individual lights. All he can see is the Light. He no longer feels suppressed by the darkness. He can do this. He can reach the Light. He can feel the Light now. It’s soft in a way the Darkness was hard. When almost all the darkness is gone he swears he can hear the light as well. It sounds just as familiar as it looks, but again Dean cannot make out any words or tune.

He feels like he is close to something now. Like a barrier or gateway. 

The Darkness is gone all there is is the Light. Dean thinks if he is dead then this is fine. To be dead and in this Light is better than to be alive in darkness. Besides he has been dead before.

Just when Dean starts to wonder if he truly is dead. Dean starts to make out a figure in the light. 

It’s a person.

A person’s face is in the Light. No, it is the Light. They aren’t just in the Light but the Light is coming from them. Just when Dean starts to recognize the figure he hears it. 

“Hello Dean”

**Author's Note:**

> Based on the idea that Dean will be able to see Cas’s trueform while possessed by Michael. 
> 
> Sometimes when there is a particularly hard battle the next day and night feels especially dark. Dean asks Cas to show him the Light once again and Dean knows it will be ok because he has an angel by his side. 
> 
> Come say "Hi" to me on tumblr at [gneisscastiel.tumblr.com](http://gneisscastiel.tumblr.com/)


End file.
